First day of 6th grade but not really

Dear Charlie,

Today should have been your first day of 6th grade. The start of middle school—a big milestone. But for you, today is different. Not quite what most people imagine; it’s your own special journey.

You should be learning about history, geography, and even some challenging math. Instead, you’re mastering the basics—learning how to hold a pencil and the letters of the alphabet. And while other kids your age are chatting with friends, you’re in a world of your own; a world that doesn’t include friends—a world that is uniquely yours.

I wish I could hear you come home, bursting with stories about your day, or even hear you grumble about homework. But that’s not our reality, and I’ve had to come to terms with that, no matter how much it tugs at my heart.

Raising you, my sweet boy, with Level 3 Autism and intellectual disability, is full of moments that are bittersweet. It’s not easy as a mom knowing that those typical childhood experiences won’t be part of your story, but I’ve learned to focus on what matters most.

The positive is that this year, you’re at a school that understands your needs, where you are safe and happy. That’s something I’ve fought for, for you for years: your safety and happiness. I’ve learned to adjust my expectations, and while it’s been a long road, I know we’re in a good place now.

I repeat: You are safe and you are happy. It’s the best gift any mother could ask for.

With all my love,

Mom