End #ActuallyAutistic Bullying

#ActuallyAutistic Bullying

I want to end #ActuallyAutistic bullying. Continually for over five years, one particular group of self-identified autism advocates has been harassing countless people online. If you’ve posted on an autism forum, you probably know them too — they’re the ones often with “Au”-branded usernames (the periodic symbol for gold) and comments tagged with the “#ActuallyAutistic” hashtag, their chosen name.

Over this period, I’ve received thousands of insults, threats, false and defamatory accusations, and sexually harassing messages. Their hate escalated beyond harassing comments, too, by sending unhinged accusations to my management and the Federal Trade Commission in an attempt to destroy my livelihood. 

People are soon going to be too afraid to even talk about autism

As I said, I’m far from the only one in this situation. There are countless autism parents and autistic adults who‘ve been bullied into silence by this loud, angry minority. I can’t tell you how many times a post of mine has been absolutely swarmed by #ActuallyAutistic, and the many people who come in support of me arrive in my DMs, with an apology for not doing it publicly because they are too scared, and rightfully so, of being the next target. 

This is real. These are not isolated incidents. These aren’t a couple of bad actors within an otherwise positive organization. It’s pervasive, and it is profoundly destructive and toxic.  

Let’s put an end to the bullying. Email me your experience!

If you‘ve been the victim of this type of bullying or harassment or have ever kept quiet for fear of similar bullying or retaliation, please email me at to share your experience. We have a team working hard to try and change things, to restore positive online discourse about autism — to reclaim our voices — by ridding our community of this abhorrent behavior. I’ll keep responses anonymous unless you want to be public

I’ll leave you with a few screenshots I’ve remembered to save. And remember, you are not alone. Whether you’re a parent, autistic yourself, or both, you’re allowed any opinion you want on the many contentious topics surrounding autism today. Your voice deserves to be heard — if you’re respectful.

Let’s end #ActuallyAutistic bullying.

bullying #actuallyautistic
Threatening to report me to CPS

Terra Vance, spread a rumor that I’m the reason a mother killed her autistic child. To this day, I still don’t even know what crime she’s referring to. It was in July 2020. PS: I’m not alt-right. I voted Biden.

Sexual Harrassment

Lovely DMs

This comment made to one of my followers, who was defending me.

Here’s my blog post about grieving.

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  • Reply
    2021-04-11 at 1:15 AM

    I am Brazilian and I use to censorship words related to autism for this reason, I will be bullied just because I don’t agree with neurodiversity.
    That’s so hypocritical bullying someone autistic especially a person like me who is suicidal.

  • Reply
    2021-04-11 at 2:43 AM

    ABA is abuse though. Maybe do some research on it

  • Reply
    Javier Anda
    2021-04-11 at 8:40 AM

    vdamn i waonder why people who are actually autistic are “bullying” nuerotypical poeple for speaking over them and pretending like they know whats best for us bettter than we do

  • Reply
    2021-04-11 at 11:01 PM

    Eileen AKA theautismcafe instigates a lot of hateful comments she receives from the autistic community. She purposely post things that she knows will upset people or comments something on an autistic persons page that she knows will trigger them….Then takes screenshots of the traumatised reactions and uses it to paint herself as a victim. Meanwhile she blocks autistic people on social media to make it seem like everyone has her views and that she’s right, basically silencing autistic people from having a say. She does this for her own personal agenda. She’s bullied a lot of autistic people and upset most of the community… which is how she’s alienated herself from the autistic community. The things she posts in Facebook groups with screenshots after instigating something is disgusting… then these autistic people end up getting loads of abuse and being pulled apart left right and center. Things she says in this groups is horrible. Eileen is narcissistic sociopath on a level I haven’t even seen before. I’m starting to worry about Eileen if I’m honest. Does she believe what she’s saying is true? Or is she just a person who likes playing the victim?

    • Reply
      2021-04-11 at 11:53 PM

      Hi Amber, can you show me one instance of me bullying someone?


  • Reply
    2021-04-22 at 11:22 PM

    Anyone who claims that Eileen instigates arguments for these screenshots has obviously not been paying attention. Look up anyone related to “Autistic Dark Web” (anyone ever stop to think where that nickname even started?), or even Fierce Autie’s “Block List” has been sharing similar stories if not screenshots of their own. Feel free to Google.

  • Reply
    Scott Grey
    2021-07-27 at 8:14 PM

    Hiding behind the internet and attacking people with such horrible words is despicable. When the threats and such are so blatantly aggressive, if the person has an identified employer, I”m sure the employer would be less than thrilled to learn their employee is using the computer for such horrible messaging. I have serious misgivings as to whether these individuals are even autistic to begin with as they certainly don’t represent the autistics I know.

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